April 22, 2021

Is there a right way to parent?

The McKelvy Scholars will host a discussion on parenting led by Charlie Mirsky ’23 on Sunday at 6 p.m. Email the group for the Zoom link. Charlie’s background for the talk:

Exterior view of the back of McKelvy House, with green grass and pink-purple flowersNew parents always seem to put so much thought into how they should conduct themselves during and shortly after pregnancy. Wealthier parents even frequently hire “professionals” to teach them how to change a diaper and dress and feed their children. These tasks, however, are trivial compared to both the difficulty and importance of setting and implementing a thoughtful, long-term parenting plan. But almost no parents think about this in advance!

I would really like to learn more about everyone’s upbringing and how they think it affects them today. Moreover, I think it will be interesting for us to evaluate the parenting strategies we experienced with our own families and then attempt to determine whether there is an optimal method that stands out. My hope is that by the end of discussion, we will have at the very least identified suboptimal parenting styles and worked through some difficult questions.

For the first 15-25 minutes (depending on how many people show up to the discussion), we will talk about our own relationships with parenting. After that, we will try to answer the remaining questions.

Here are some questions to think about:

  • Do you plan on having/adopting kids?
  • How were you brought up? Do you feel like your parents did a good job? If you plan to have children, will you bring your kids up differently?
  • Is there one way to parent that works for all children?
  • How do you think parenting has changed in recent years?
  • Do you think children are impacted more by parents setting a subconscious example for behavior? Or do you think following a strict parenting strategy can yield similar results, even if parents may not possess the kinds of qualities they want to instill in their children?
  • How can we make sure that our kids build a secure future for themselves without forcing them to take a particular educational or career path?

Sources to review

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